Purr Inside Of Me

It’s around one month since we have returned from Taipei. I planned to write something here earlier, but to be honest - partly I didn’t have a time, and mostly I didn’t want to…
Few unpleasant things happened to me and I just wanted to get used to them.

Well… I’ve been sick since we arrived in Taiwan and I still didn’t fully heal! I just caught the flu. I was taking tons of medicines and every time when I thought I’m finally getting better, flu has returned!
I had to cancel every meeting I had during this week. I hope then next week will stay exactly as I planned it before because I've already fallen behind with my duties.
Another not-positive thing what happened to me is that during our trip I got an info about losing my job. My PM couldn’t even explain it to me in any reasonable way. I just got few semi-explanations which supposed to give me short shrift...
It was easy to combine the facts - my coworker did say something at the wrong time. I was pretty sure, that he did it accidentally (it’s exactly his style) and he’ll be able to clear it up. Believe me, I was super surprised, when I learned that he did it on purpose…
I still haven’t figured it out what did he say, because he didn’t have the courage to admit it, but now I just know what I can expect from him.
Do you know what’s the funniest thing? When the project was going to begin HE asked me to join it!
I was talking with the rest of team members and we all suspect, that he felt worse than us - because our ideas were usually praised... Well, I’m a Junior Developer and he is a MID.
Luckily the rest of the team consists of Seniors, so they aren’t threatened with dismissal.
I have no idea why he did feel worse - we were always praised as a team, not as a single person. No one knew which solution was mine, which was his, and which was someone’s else!
But I know one thing - karma always returns. Every positive and negative thing you make to someone will come back to you and for everyone else.
I’m trying to think positive, there is always some advantage in any circumstances. I wanted to change my job anyway, but I didn’t have so much self-denial to make it right now. But to be honest - I was totally bored in this project, I felt that I’m not evolving; not making any progress in my knowledge. Sometimes I had no tasks for few weeks!
So now I have a chance to find something more interesting, with better employment conditions which help me to get experience for the future.

What else here?

Since I have returned to Poland I realized that I enjoy driving a car even more than before.
When I’m comparing driving here and in Taiwan, I feel more comfortable and safe here. Roads clots are everywhere, but here we have relatively less of them.
I enjoy driving and I’m an oasis of tranquility during my ride. There are not a lot of things, which can make mine blood boil.

Succulents which I bought in Taiwan have survived 18 hours flight! I replanted them immediately upon arrival. They seem to be in good condition and they’re growing so fast. One of them broke a little bit during changing a pot, but I got around 12 new seedlings from broken leaves. Some of them started growing roots after 2 days! They’ll gain new pots after they get adult.

During this month in Poland, I decided to buy more cute succulents. I love to replant them and take care of them. They all make me feel good. Our home is cozier right now.
I really enjoy buying new ceramic pots, I have found few places with really nice stuff.

I usually buy a soil in home improvement store, but I realized, that it’s too heavy for succulents. They prefer to grow up in light and loose pebble soil. It’s very important to let them dry fast, they don’t like wet soil.
I started to mix my heavy soil with the thin grit and active carbon.
I was using thick gravel as a first layer, active carbon for the second layer and a soil as a lat layer so far. I did some modification right now: I’m also using thick gravel as a first layer and later I’m just using a mix of soil, grit, and carbon. The soil is of course dedicated to succulents - it contains some fertilizer that supports their growth.
It’s, of course, possible to buy high-quality soil (for e.g. in ‘zielonyparapet’ online store), but to be honest - it’s not profitable to me to order it there.
I have a lot of succulents and I’m buying new plants all the time. I need to have a stock of soil at home just in case. It’s cheaper for me to buy it in home improvement store (it’s two times more soil in the same price) and also I mix it with the grit and active carbon, which actually makes four times more soil from one bag!
Of course, I also have to buy a grit but it’s ridiculously cheap.
Active carbon is more expensive, but even if I use online bought soil I’ll have to buy it anyway - so it’s the same price.
Using active carbon is also very important, it prevents roots moldering.
And also buying soil in stationary shop helps me to save a time - it’s faster (and cheaper too) to take a car than wait for a delivery.

After I returned home I also feel, that my cats are closer to me than before. I spend more time with them right now. They always want to accompany me whatever I do. They were always curious and inquisitive, but now they probably need me more for some reason.
Maybe I’m subconsciously getting into their heads, that I also need them more at the moment. They’re damn smart animals! And totally pure heart. I feel comfortable and calm when I can spend my time with them.

I missed Spring so much. When I see the sunlight and everything is getting green, I feel that my soul is in better condition. I have more power and it’s easier for me to take new challenges. When I finally feel better I plan to make a bike trip to the forest nearby my home. It also gives me a power injection.

For now, I’m spending my time mostly on the loggia with cats. Since I can remember they always loved to spend their time there, so now we can chill out together. They’re moving from the sun to the shadow and conversely.

We still didn’t have enough time to clean up after the Winter. Yesterday I visited a garden store, I have bought some balcony flowers, herbs, and strawberries.
Parthenocissus tricuspidata which I forgot to water during the Autumn and Winter started growing buds! I augur well for three plants, we’ll see how the last one will look like after the next few weeks.
I also would like to make some cotton curtains to be able to spend hot days on my loggia too.

I plan to replant them all to the huge pots during this weekend. I also want to unclutter the whole loggia. Maybe I should think about buying some small coffee table!

Easter was quite gloomy, cool and not really pleasant. But anyway I finally could rest; it has been the first time for few years! I have no idea what was the difference between these holidays and the holidays in the past but I really felt nice. Maja also had a good mood, she willingly played and she even ate the whole meal! I have problems with feeding her recently, she doesn’t want to eat anything at home.
This holidays gave me illusory hope, that I was able to charge my mental batteries. Good enough I think.

My Art Spirit came back. I made one friendship bracelet so far and I prepared embroidery floss for the second one. It has been waiting for few days until I start working on it. I would love to make the alpha pattern bracelet for the first time. I hope that my Art Spirit will stay with me for a long time and I have enough enthusiasm to make it.

I’m slowly preparing myself for the Scotland May-June trip. We’re going to take a car and go to Birmingham for the UK Games Expo and to spend some time with my penpal friend. Next, we’re going to visit Nottingham and later we’re going directly to Scotland.
We still have a lot of time to the departure, but I can’t wait to go! I really like Poland but I started to feel, that I no longer belong to her. I feel that ‘my place’ is somewhere else. I still didn’t figure it out where is it, but I think one day I will. I hope I will.
All in all - the most important is with whom we are not where we live.