As I told my friend some time ago - I can count on one hand the number of people who really know me. All my friends (even close to me) know as much as I want them to know about my life.I’ve been planning to add this post for more than a year. Yes, that’s right - I’ve been collecting all these things I want you to know for a long time. And now I’m ready to make some of them public. I have no influence on some them, but I’ve accepted them. Some of them I even like.
Sooo… let’s go:
- I like how trashing files on Windows sound. When I was a kid I’ve created some small notepad files just to delete them and trash! Today I’m not making nonsense files, but I enjoy deleting files from the trash with the maximum volume. Luckily (for me) Apple also uses similar sound for the trash.
- I know how dying looks like. There is no black tunnel with the bright light in the end. There is emptiness; endless void out there. And you can feel that you’re draining away to the infinite journey. You can only regret that you were supposed to do so much in your lives and you’ve done nothing. The consciousness always dies at the end. I’ve been going through it 6 years ago in the Medical University of Warsaw at the cardiology ward during the pacemaker implantation surgery. Cardiac arrest.
- I’m afraid of crossing railroad tracks when there is no passage there. There is no reason for my fear - no one I know (or even no one I don’t know personally) haven’t been hit by the train.
- I totally love stationery and haberdashery stores! I can ALWAYS find something nice to buy there.
- I’m tangling knots on my hair while I’m stressed. I usually don’t have any control over it, I realize about that when I can’t move my finger which stuck in the tight loop.
- I can only get asleep with my 4 pillows. I lie only on the one of them, the rest 3 I need to hug in different combinations.
- I’m 100 times more patient for animals than for people. I can turn a blind eye when the cat destroys my favorite T-shirt, knock my phone down from the table, or any other mischief he/she does. But if some person does the same, I’ll probably be yelling at him/her. I’ve adopted a problematic cat 4 years ago; she was sick, withdrawn and we had to work with her for around 2 years. Now she’s sociable and she loves to hug.
- I can control my dreams. There is no magic in it, until recently, I thought that everyone can do that. When I appear in some dream I can easily decide what I want to say or do. It’s like 2nd life for me.
- I realized, that sometimes I think in English. I’m not an Alpha and Omega, but I can easily understand and communicate with other people. I’ve recently learned that I like myself more when I speak or think in English. I think everyone has a bit different personality while speaking a different language. Maybe I was born in the wrong country?
- I have depression - like around 80% of society.
- I like to imagine some alternative realities of my life. All the events are taking place in the past or presence - never in the future. These are situations, which will never happen, I’m involving people who I know (so for e.g. I can’t meet them for the first time again). I can live these imaginations over and over again.
- I exchange letters with people from around the world.
- I used to hate all the plants at home, they were an unnecessary problem for me. Today I can’t imagine my life without succulents and cacti. I’ve been growing them at home since the September 2017.
- I like to take off dry PVA glue from my hands. When this glue dries, it becomes a thin cover, which you can easily remove flake by flake. It’s not toxic, it’s often used in the kindergartens, kids can accidentally eat it and nothing bad will happen.
- I like to sing, I accept how my voice sounds, although it’s terrible! I only howl when I’m driving the car alone, haha! Even if I don’t know the lyrics. Lucky me that no one is watching videos from the car cam, it also records the sound...
- When I’m not making manicure for a long time it usually means that I have no motivation to take care of myself. But you don’t have to be worried about me right now, ‘cause after 2 years of using UV cured nail polish I got allergic for them! I had to stop using them. After the fingers treatment, some break for any nail polish and allergic tests I’m going to check out other nail polish. I’ll probably try vegan ones.
- When I was a kid I dreamed about having a defect of vision, just because I liked how people in glasses look like. I’ve been using glasses for a short while and I like myself more.
- I’m an introvert, a withdrawn person, which doesn't like crowded places. I know that I can give an impression of the open and ‘go-ahead’ person. I hate phone calls, I prefer to text someone instead.
- My favorite kind of music is heavy metal. When I was in school I was ashamed of it and I pretended that I’m like the others. I was listening to the same songs as my friends did (when I was with them only of course).
- I totally love to drive a car, it makes me calm and in good mood. I prefer to resign from drinking alcohol during the party, just to be able to drive a car later. The distance counter in the car shows 29977 km made in the last 13 months. It’s impressive, isn’t it?
And that’s all for today.
(photo made around September 2018)
I am grateful to have found a vegan & organic nail salon near my office, so neither I nor the nail tech are getting polluted with chemicals! After I witnessed a car going out of control at a parade, I began to have a huge fear of bridges. I've overcome it mostly, but if I am driving, I keep my eyes locked in front, and never look to the sides.
ReplyDeleteI love this post, learning more about you. And I like taking PVA off my hands, too! This really is a fun idea for a post.
ReplyDeleteSo many interesting things about you! I do want to say that I respectfully disagree with what you said in #2 about only emptiness and endless void when dying. After we die, there is one of two places in which we will be. We will either spend eternity with our Lord and Savior or eternity without Him (and yes, that would result in darkness and emptiness). I felt compelled to comment on this because it is my hope that others will have this hope. I hope you don't mind if I just take a moment to share my faith. God created us. He loves us so very much. We have all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. He sent His Son, Jesus Christ, to die for our sins and to save us. It isn't about religion at all. Religion can't save us. The decision that will determine where we spend eternity is whether we have believed in His Son, Jesus Christ, trusting Him as our Savior and following Him as Lord. Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me” (John 14:6). There is only one way to enter the gates of heaven—and that is through faith in Jesus Christ, and Him alone. I don't think there's anything more important than where we're going to spend eternity. Thanks for listening. :)
ReplyDeleteI also hug my pillows ;)
ReplyDeleteHappy weekend :)
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